Size Matters?

Size matters. Clothing size that is.

The little number on the back of your dress, blouse and trousers, has the power to rule your life and crumple your self-confidence into nothing. And you’re supposed to care about that number, that no one else sees. Or rather, that’s what the fashion industry want, or that’s what you think they want.

In reality no one really cares what size you are, whether you’re big or small, except you. The only person that really cares is you. No one else.

I can understand that some would become a little upset when they try a dress on in their usual size and it doesn’t fit, but just because you have to go up a size or two, doesn’t mean you are that size. We all know that sizes differ in every clothing store and some even have their own sizing systems.

Apparently one woman, didn’t get that same memo and when she could only fit her size 12 body into a size 20 dress from H&M, she was outraged. Now, I’ll admit that 12 to 20 is a big leap and is a little unusual. But, knowing that H&M is a European country and knowing European sizes are very different to the UK, you should expect some variation in “sizes”. In response to this unusual sizing, I would expect a wee rant on Facebook saying “Can you believe this? Madness! Oh well, still look good!” But the young woman in question went to a level that I like to call Ultimate Snowflake Mode!

I’ll link to the article below, but while bashing H&M for their horrendous labelling, she went on to say:

“I can only imagine the psychological impact a size 20 could have on a young impressionable girl”

Yes, young girls struggle with body image more than adults, they are under a lot of pressure and can be easily upset. But I don’t think any girl with an ounce of common sense would allow a wrong label to cause psychological damage.

A label is just that. A label. It is not a certificate. It is a piece of fabric with a number printed on it. And it doesn’t mean anything if you value yourself instead of your image.

To end her rant, she says:

“Do not blame manufacturers for your issues. It is YOUR company who label these items and it is YOUR company who clearly has issues with everyday women wearing your clothes. It is disgusting behaviour on your part. You should be ashamed of yourselves.”

Personally, I’ve never had a problem with H&M sizing and a part of me wonders if the experience this woman went through is a rarity. Unless she tried on every size 12 item in the store, I cannot believe that this is a problem with their clothing. Dress styles vary a lot in size and it could be possible that that specific line of clothing was mislabelled meaning it was an accident.

Making a fuss about sizes like this woman, strengthens the misconception that size matters. Instead of ranting and raving, maybe she should have just given others a heads up about that pesky dress and moved on.

What I’m trying to say is, if you know that you are a size 12, or whatever, and in one shop, you can only fit into a size 20 (or whatever), it clearly means that that size 20 is not a size 20 and you should definitely not worry about that number. Because it simply doesn’t matter.

Whatever your actual size, you are beautiful and you should be proud of yourself for being such a badass and not allowing numbers to rule your life.

DM article: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-4249924/Size-12-woman-blasts-H-M-sizing.html

Love TRUMPs Hate

Over the last few days’ tensions have been running high throughout the World. We have all been watching Washington D.C with bated breath for a long time now (it feels like decades, I mean really, am I the only one that got sick of all the Presidential race coverage?). But on the 20th, it happened…Donald Trump became President of the United States and the entire World seemed to split into two. The next four years (come on, stop saying eight, don’t assume…we all know what that does) are going to be extremely interesting for all of us. Yes, America, not just you guys.

Donald Trump will affect us all and what that affect will be, no one really knows yet. I’m no expert in politics, in fact, I hate the subject, however I have seen how this man has already had an impact on people’s lives. Protests, riots, violence, a lot even before he was elected! It amazed and sickened me how one man can turn so many people against each other.

I’m a firm believer that everyone has a right to their own opinion and that everyone’s opinion should be respected, even if you disagree with it. I often say, “you’re an allowed an opinion, just don’t be a little s**thead about it.” And people usually follow that rule, because people are decent (most of the time). But now, it seems that if you support Trump, you’re the spawn of Satan himself.

I will say that I’m not a supporter of Trump, but then I’m not a supporter of Clinton either. I thought that the choices America had were just bloody awful and you’d probably do better with a dead guy, or a dog…but hey, you had to pick someone, right?

And because you had to pick someone (because if you didn’t vote and could…well, you know), you really can’t be angry if someone voted differently, because their opinions are different to yours and that is okay. There are a lot of us that do not like Trump, but we must accept that he is the President and the only thing we can do is wait and see what happens. We can be sceptical, but we shouldn’t be taking our anger out on each other and instead be making positives out of the negatives.

We must remember to love and respect each other, despite our opinions. If you think he is disrespectful and heartless, then do not act in the same way. Arguing, fighting and hating each other will not make this situation any easier. Voice your opinion in respectful ways and allow others to voice there’s without turning into a s**thead. Your voice will get further when you make valid points and not argue in childish ways.

We should all show Trump…that love and respect trumps hate! By loving and respecting each other. (After all, being a good and kind person is a lot easier and much more rewarding than being a s**thead.)

via Daily Prompt: Devastation

Image: Google.

2016 is Dead – My Goals for 2017

2016 is over. Thank God! For the last few years I’ve thought, “Am I the only one that’s had a terrible year?” I think I can safely say, that I am definitely NOT the only one. 2016 was a complete and utter shit storm for a lot of us and I pray that 2017 does not turn into 2016 Mark II.

In an attempt to make 2017 a better year for me, I’ve made a small list of what I’m going to try and do before Sunday 31st December 2017.

First, I want to completely finish Littlewolf and be happy with what I’ve created. I already have people telling me they love it, but I need to make it better and I’ve already started work on that. I’ve roughly estimated that I’ll finish the second draft and the editing by the end of March 2017. Every hour I spend on Littlewolf is not going to be wasted and I intend on that showing in my work. This is my biggest goal for this year and I am determined for it to happen. I love Littlewolf and the world I’ve created and I want to share it with everyone.

Second, I want to get my health under control. At the moment, my B12 and Vitamin D deficiencies are slowing me down and making me sick, a lot. With depression, anxiety and back problems thrown on top, most of my days are a struggle. Some days are better than others, but I look forward to the day where I can wash without aids and make food without help. I used to be independent and I want to be that again.

Third, I want to do what I love. This is more of an addition to my first goal, as what I love, is writing. But I want to write more after Littlewolf, I have so many ideas that I want to turn into stories. I want to be able to write for a living and share my stories with the world. I have never loved any job that I’ve had, apart from this one.

Fourth, I think everyone has this goal, but I thought I’d include it anyway. Spend more time with those I love. My family and friends, where ever they are in the World. I want to spend more time with them and make memories. This goal isn’t just a 2017 goal, it’s a goal for life.

For the moment, I think that’s it, or at least they’re the most important to me. I’m not saying things like “New year, new me,” That never works out for anybody and I don’t need to change who I am to make these goals a reality, I just need to change how I do some things. I never make goals to eat healthier, because that never works out either. I just can’t stand salad.

But I think having goals for the year, will help make the year what you want it to be. So, do you have any goals? Or did you have goals in 2016 that you fulfilled?

I hope everyone reading this has a fantastic 2017, for whatever reason!

Like and share with your mum, brother and cat.

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/year/

Image from Google

Just Call Me Dory

Health issues are a problem we all face at some point in our lives, and we develop conditions and recover over time. We get help where we can, but ultimately, we change our habits to please our new lifestyles.

Those of us with any ounce of common sense knows that anything can strike anyone at any age. Ten year olds can have heart attacks, arthritis can strike at fourteen, or if you’re like me, you can have a terrible memory before you turn twenty-five.

My short-term memory has become increasingly more worrying over the last year and some days are worse than others.

But what really grinds my gears, is the reaction I get from people when they ask how I am and I tell them that it’s a bad memory day. And then, instead of saying “That’s okay”, they scoff and give me a look as if to say, “Memory problems, yeah right!”

This happened to me very recently by someone I have known for a few years. They even turned their back on me when I continued speaking. That really pissed me off.

Now, seeing as a lot of people are yet to see me at my worst, allow me to give you a little insight, in the hopes it helps you to understand what I mean by “Memory problems”.

On a bad day, I cannot hold a conversation. Why? Because I forget sentences while I’m saying them. I forget what I’ve said as soon as I’ve said it and my train of thought is none existent. Whoever I’m speaking to needs to fill in the blanks for me, or the conversation just dies. And I forget what the conversation was about. I need to write down what people say to me, or I’ll forget what they’ve told me almost as soon as they’ve finished.

I don’t just forget if I’ve fed myself, but I also question if I fed the dog! I have to set strict alarms for any medication I am on, or I’ll forget to take it…and then I’ll forget that I have taken it.

I could go on, but I think you get the idea. And so, when I say, “My memory is bad today,” I really do mean it. There’s no, “Yeah right” about it. And so, I kindly ask, that if I ever do say this to you, that you don’t respond like you’ve got a giant stick up your arse. Because I already feel bad enough, without you making it worse.

I’m not ‘having a go’ at any of you reading, this is a dig/rant at a particular person, but unfortunately, they’ll never see it. And I am sick of people reacting this way, which is why I have written this.

I suppose the moral of the story is don’t judge what you don’t know.

Rant over. Regular programming will now resume. Thank you for reading and understanding, I appreciate it.

 

Image from Google.

August Update – I know, I’m Terrible!

It’s been a while and I apologise. Below I’ve written an update to everything that’s going on with me. Blog posts will be more regular very soon (hopefully).

Writing is a very important part of my life. It’s what I love and want to do. But juggling everything can be hard. Blogs, Littlewolf, scripts and now I’ve started a new podcast with my good friend Sammy! Some would say I take on too much, but I never think that’s the case. I enjoy what I do, so doing more is surely better?

Episode 1 of our new podcast is just over an hour long and we talk about (surprise, surprise) writing! We talk about our writing process, our favourite books, our least favourite and so on. We plan to release an episode once a month to start with (with different topics every month), as we are both busy little ladies, but the next episode should be coming out within the next week or two and hopefully I’ll get a blog post out along with it! So, if you’re struggling with your writing process, or just curious as to how other writers do things, tune into our podcast, it might help you. Or who knows, maybe you’ll even have tips for us.

On top of this, I have also entered Littlewolf onto Inkshares. The first two chapters are available to read and you can even pre-order it. I’m working hard on the third chapter, but for some reason I’m finding it difficult as parts just aren’t meshing together. But I’ll get it done soon.

https://www.inkshares.com/books/littlewolf-and-the-broken-veil

My writing life is quite hectic at the moment and I always end up writing more than one piece at once. So for now, I’m concentrating most of my time on Littlewolf and using my breaks to write a thriller script. I think it’s always good to break up big projects with smaller ones and keep those creative juices flowing.

I am also taking part in a play with a theatre group I have been with for five years now. Last year I took a break away from acting due to my ill health, but now I’m back into it and have rehearsals 3-4 times a week for now. But after September, the play will be over and my evenings will go back to writing. Until the Pantomime beginnings (if I decide to be a part of that).

I’m trying to get a new schedule in play so that I can squeeze blog posts in between everything else. Keeping everyone up to date is hard, but it’s very important to me that my readers know that I am still here, I’m just neck deep in writing!

I’ll try and give you all a little blog post about Littlewolf soon.

I’ll talk to you all soon!

 

You Have An Opinion, Just Don’t Be a Jerk

Last year I wrote a blog post about opinions and how you should probably behave when you have one that differs to someone else. But it seems that more and more people have a burning desire to voice their opinion and that would be a fantastic thing, if they weren’t being unbearable jerks about it.

Three or four times in the past two or three weeks I have come across people who disagreed so much with my opinion, that they felt the need to create an argument about it. Because they felt that they were right and I was wrong.

Now, if I am wrong (and I’m proven wrong with solid facts), I will happily hold my hands up and admit it, I have no problem with being wrong, because we’re all wrong at some point. It’s how we learn. But even if my opinion is wrong, it doesn’t give you the right to lecture me. What difference does it make to you, if I am wrong? You would know that you were right, so why create an uncomfortable and frustrating situation out of nothing?

I am entitled, just as you are, to my own opinion and if my opinion is wrong, that’s on me. For example, if you thought Brexit was a bad idea and I thought it was a good idea, we should not argue about it, we should accept that we both have different opinions and different reasons for those opinions.

It’s very easy to accept someone’s opinion and not be a jerk, but for some reason people love to make their opinion known to you and won’t quit until they’ve “won”.

I’m sorry, I don’t use social media to ask for you to weigh in on my opinions, I use it to express myself and whether you like it or not, I’m allowed to make my opinions known. I’ll happily welcome someone to say, “I politely disagree, because (whatever they have to say), that is all.” But I cannot accept people approaching me with “You’re wrong, because this, how can you possibly be right?” That’s just rude.

Everyone is allowed their own opinion, it’s a basic right, freedom of speech and all that jazz. But you do not have the right to criticize and talk down to someone because you think you’re right. That’s not having an opinion, that’s just being a jerk for the sake of being a jerk.

We are all allowed to comment and have an opinion on whatever we want, whether it’s something personal, or if it’s an incident in the World News. As an English person I’m allowed to comment on the gun crisis in America, just as Americans are allowed to comment on Brexit. We can talk about whatever the hell we want and have the right to say it freely without being attacked for it.

What I’m trying to say is, can we just stop causing conflict for no reason? Can we stop creating arguments and being jerks to one another? I’m allowed an opinion; you’re allowed an opinion. Hell, we’re even allowed to disagree with one another. You’re allowed to disagree with this blog and I’m fine with that…unless you’re being a jerk unnecessarily.

It really isn’t difficult to get on with someone who has a different view to you, all you have to do is move on and go on with your life. Whether it’s with that person in your life or not.

So let’s get on with our lives. Because there’s enough conflict in this world already, without us adding to it.

But once again, that’s just…my opinion.

 

Are You a Mat Or a Mountain?

On Monday I attended a very difficult and upsetting meeting and I came out of it with a new view of myself. All of my life, I have been walked over like a door mat and I never really knew what to do about it. It doesn’t help that I am a super sensitive and emotional person. I mean…I cry at sad adverts for goodness sake. But I know that doesn’t make me weak and it doesn’t stop me from kicking ass when I need to (metaphorically of course).

So the lesson I learned about myself, was simply that I am a strong person. I did not break down during the meeting, my eyes did let some tears go, from reliving the traumatic experiences I had gone through. But I did not break down. I held my own. I stood up for myself. I was strong.

For the first time in my life, I felt like I was winning. I felt like the doormat side of me, had been thrown away. And I realised that that strength was inside of me the entire time, I just didn’t know it was there.

The person that supported me through the meeting continuously told me, “You’re so strong, do you know that?”

My answer? “No…I’m not.”

But when I returned home and calmed down a little, I did begin to feel like I had gained some strength. I wasn’t as upset as I was before, I wasn’t as sensitive to the subject.

Standing up for yourself in difficult situations can be extremely hard and difficult. You have to wait for the opportune moment and judging that can be tricky. But you shouldn’t allow yourself to be a door mat, to anybody. Be a wall, a mountain that cannot move.

I was once a door mat. Now I am a strong, tall, mountain.